Friday, October 31, 2008

Am I destined Mrs. Hayes?

To those of you who are gainfully employed or otherwise expected to be someplace, at some time, with some regularity - I envy you. I have learned, oh these many weeks, that I don't do well without "the daily grind." Apparently I'm qualified, or at least appear to be such on paper, for I have been blessed with well over 10 interviews in the past 4wks. But alas, no job offers lie in wait for me to date. At least I have a back-up that seems so logical and yet so foreign to me.

In fall 1995 I began my higher-ed career with a major in Theater Education - I felt a strong connection to the arts and hoped to one day inspire others to find their path of passion. I quickly changed my major, out of spite more than anything, devoting my heart to the arts alone, leaving education to fend for itself. In May of this year I completed a Masters of Education degree...not in curriculum and instruction mind you...that was still too scary to commit to. So as I continue to interview for a position in higher ed my plan laying in wait is to become a certified teacher. I am working on getting my fingerprint card followed by my sub cert followed be yet another Master's degree, this time with more marketability - a teacher certification.

The hesitation? The unknown of course! Numerous informants have told me they sense I would be a great teacher, but does my heart fear otherwise? For things which are too monstrous for me to wrap my head around (such as this decision) I turn it all over to the Fates. It's a bit like putting your future into the clairvoyance of a Magic 8-Ball, but it works for me. If I get hired for one of these 10+ jobs I've interviewed for - so be it. My life will remain in higher ed (for the near future at least). However, if in fact no job offer comes to me, then I shall jump - fully and whole-heartedly into the classroom, where alas I am not the student, but the teacher. Perhaps only time will tell where I'm meant to be. Regardless, I must find my path soon, for stay-at-home wife does not suit me without baby on hip or group of like-minded fellows to waste away the days with.

Thursday, October 9, 2008


Words of wisdom that have reared their head lately...
"Everything happens for a reason" - although you may not know why at the time.

"God will only give you what you can handle" - regardless of your religious beliefs, I've found amazing strength in times I thought I wouldn't.

"Mothers are crazy" - you love them anyway, even if it means given them some space now and again.

"Today is the first day of the rest of your life" - isn't cool that you can right your wrongs with the dawning of a new day?!?! here's where I'm at today:
Employment status: pending...have had 2 interviews, have another on the books. Hoping for 2nd interviews soon. (Primarily because I'm going stir crazy with no where to be from 8-5).

Health status: I'm really out of shape. I have tried to go for a run twice now and feel like my calves are on fire and my lungs are on strike...but I also feel pretty empowered and know that my endurance will return. I have found a new, fun, fabulous way to shake my groove thang. That's right I'm bellydancing. The tricks I have found
1) Find a great teacher (I've lucked out with my dear friend Cari)
2) Laugh a lot
3) Stand in the back so you can't really see yourself (you'll just obsess and it won't be pretty)
4) Laugh a lot

...I have found it's really hard to hold my arms up for an hour long class and that I feel strong, fluid, and empowered when I bellydance. Who knew?

So if you ever have the opportunity to bellydance I highly recommend it. If you are in the Valley area check out Anaya Tribal ( they're some amazing ladies that will make you want to move.

Weath: let's not go there...things will be much better when we're a 2 income house again.

Family: I couldn't ask for better inlaws, their unconditional support of us has been amazing. My husband is a testament of strength and caring, he can still make me laugh everyday even when dark clouds loom.

As for's all about the NEXT - back on the road to log another mile, back in the studio to laugh and shimmy, and back online to tweak my resume, back to my roots of doing what's good and right for me so I may be blessed again.