Tuesday, September 23, 2008

out of loss comes growth

The loss of our child on September 11 (what's with that day?!?!) was extremely painful in every sense of the word. This tragedy presented us a wonderful opportunity to start anew - reflect on our decisions, our wants, our dreams and set into motion the plans yet-to-be made.

That being said we now realize that Flagstaff is not our home, not now, there is sadness here and lack of opportunity for where we are in our professional journeys. As a result we've decided to reclaim our lives and move to Phoenix (west valley). It is here that I hope we can find healing and opportunities to grow...in every sense of the word.

Sadly, one of my biggest supporters - my mother, disapproves and vocally rejects this decision. Her anger, for not choosing a path she has designed for me and caused her share very painful and intentionally hurtful things over the past few days. So, sadly I must mourn a death once more this year - this time it is the death of my relationship with my Mother. My hope is that with time and distance she can come to a place of acceptance and support for me. She is just unable to do so at this time.

I will be very glad when 2008 draws to a close and I can put to rest a year filled with death, poverty, disappointment, and sadness and look to the bright future I hope 2009 holds filled with endless possibilities.

So if you're ever in I-10 heading west through PHX...give us a call!
Wishing all who read this love, health, and happiness - may they have no limit in your lives.

Until next time, the not-quite-yet mother


Gina said...

Ben and I are sending you both lots of love. You are such a beautiful and strong woman, goddess Tracey. You are brave and beloved, and I wish you the best on your next move. I'm so sorry that you have experienced these losses. Write or call anytime you would like a listener. Big besos.

Tracey Hayes said...

muchas gracias mijita - love to you and Ben!